BiRtHdAy StRiPPeR!
by ThuGoldenChild
Summary: Edward's birthday is coming up and Emmett decides he needs a stripper to celebrate. One Shot. OOC.


**Author's Note: **_So heres a lovely little one shot. I wanted to write this for my b-day, so I did. I love you all read on. _

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**Birthday Stripper**

"I don't want a stripper. Damn it Emmett, wont you just leave me the fuck alone." He was really grating my nerves at the moment. It was moment's like this that made me wonder what the hell Esme, out mother, was thinking when she decided to try for a second child.

"Come the fuck on Edward. She's fucking hot, don't be such a puss." Was his reply.

"Fuck off Emmett." I told him as I slammed the bedroom door closed, making my way down the stairs.

Emmett was such a child sometimes. My birthday was coming up. Monday to be exact, today was Friday. I was turning 23 years old and I was done with things such as party's and strippers. All I wanted was to take my girlfriend and settle down into a more permanent circumstances. I had planned on asking her to move in with me this weekend. We had been together for almost seven months. There was no doubt in my mind that she was the one girl wanted to spend the rest of my life with. She was perfect in every way imaginable.

It looked like there was going to be no way to get around this stupid ass party Emmett and Jazz, my best friend, had planned. Man I did not want to spend the night getting drunk and receiving lap dances.

"Eddie" Emmett whined as I made myself a couple fried eggs. "C'mon I already asked Belly, she said it was fine. She even suggested the chick. That made me turn around.

"What do you mean she suggested the stripper?!" I asked, dumbfounded.

"Yea, she said she knew the girl." He shrugged. "I've seen her, She's pretty hot." He made his way to the refrigerator and pulled out the carton of eggs, while I gaped. My Bella knew a stripper and wanted me to allow her to give me a lap dance. Surely I was hearing things wrong. I thought girlfriends were supposed to be against this type of thing.

"Are you sure you heard her right?" I asked trying to clarify. I flipped my eggs into a bowl and grabbed a piece of toast.

"Yes man. I told her you'd act that way." He flipped his phone open, dialed a number and handed it to me. "Here she'll tell you." I place the phone to my ear and was happy to hear her beautiful voice, even if she wasn't happy at the moment.

"Emmett what the hell do you want at 7:14 in the morning?" She yelled.

"Good morning beautiful." I cooed sweetly to her.

"Edward why are you calling from Emmett's phone? Oh wait, it's that call right, the one about the stripper?" She asked.

"Um, yeah I guess. Emmett just handed me the phone and said she'll tell you." I told her as shoveled the rest of my eggs down.

"Edward I don't care if you get a stripper. As long as you keep your dick in your pants, I'm fine with it." She grumbled.

"I love you Bella. I still don't want to do it, but if your sure you want be mad, I'll do it just to get Emmett the fuck off my back."

"Yeah, wohooo Bella, you fucking rock." Emmett yelled from beside me.

"Dude shut the hell up." I smacked him in the back of the head.

"I'll let that one pass because it's your birthday." He smiled slyly.

"Edward.." My sweet Bella sang. "I am going back to bed. I don't have class for a few more hours."

"Okay baby, I love you, I'll call on lunch." I smiled into the phone, just the sound of her voice perked my day up. Hearing her was like receiving a huge cup of coffee.

"I love you to Edward, I'll be waiting. Be safe" She replied.

"Always babe. Bye."

I looked over at Emmett as I hang the phone up. He was grinning like a goof. Such simple things to please the child. I tossed him his phone as he shoveled his eggs down. Still grinning. I sighed and rolled my eyes at him.

"Call me later man. I've got to go." I stood and popped my back, placing my bowel in the sink. I grabbed my duffle bag and headed to the door.

"Okay man, your supposed to come back here after you get off. I figured we'd just use your place." He hollered through my house.

"Whatever Em. Clean up before you leave." I walked out the door. Another day in the life of a fire fighter. I couldn't wait to get off work to see my Bella, that's all I wanted to do today.

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"How much longer man, I'm supposed to meet Bella at ten." I was wobbling slightly. I wasn't drunk, but I was pretty buzzed. The bad thing, I wasn't even having that great of a time. I hadn't gotten to see Bella yet today. All I wanted was to cuddle with her in my bed. She had something to do this evening after school, so she said she couldn't meet me till later.

"They'll be here any time, chill out Eddie." Emmett responded chugging his beer.

"Fine man but if there not here by fifteen till, I'm out." I told him taking a seat in my recliner.

Fifteen minutes later my door bell rang, and I sighed. Finally. I leaned over in my chair as I watched a tall blonde, and slender brunette come through the door. The blonde was pretty, her hair was long and curled in big bouncy curls. The brunette had her back to me, her hair in wavy curls, something on her head blocking the top of it. From behind I should see her black knee high boots, laced together in red ribbon. Both girls were wearing long coats so you couldn't see there actual outfit.

I sat quietly while Emmett welcomed them into the house. Waiting.

"C'mon Eddie you get a special dance since your the birthday boy." Emmett boomed through the house at me.

"Whatever man." I sighed. He grabbed me by my shoulders and pulled me up out of the chair and forced me to the stairs. I looked around to find the blonde in the kitchen, the brunette was missing. I looked around to see her going up the stairs. I furrowed my brow, wondering why she was going up stairs.

"Eddie this is Tonya. Tonya, Eddie." Emmett said pointing to the blonde.

"Nice to meet you. Were is she going?" I asked Emmett who was again grinning at me again.

"To prepare you for your dance, dude." He responded.

"Bella was right you are cute." Tonya giggled. I looked at her and she giggled again.

"When did you talk to Bella?" I asked.

"Earlier, don't worry Eddie, we'll take care of you." She giggled again. This chick was seriously getting on my nerves with all the giggling. I pinched the bridge of my nose and sighed.

"Go on up Edward, you'll like your dance." Emmett smiled at me.

"Fine. I don't think that Bella will like this though." I turned and went up the stairs. I looked around and found the brunette in my room on my bed.

"Um, I don't think this is a good place for the dance." I stuttered out.

She stood her back still facing me and clicked on her ipod. She pulled the jacket off and let it fall to the floor. Reveling her outfit. I gaped at her, was that a pirate costume. I gulped, how did she figure this out. I only ever told Bella that particular fantasy. She was wearing a silk black skirt, that parted at the thigh, showing her hip bone. With her back to me, I could see the bottoms of her perfectly round little ass poking out. Her shirt was red and cream colored, stripe, off the shoulder small piece of fabric. It barely covered her back, showing me her deliciously looking smooth skin. Her cream colored sash sat on her hips over the skirt. (_Link to outfit on my profile._)

She turned and my mouth dropped open. I was gaping, it was obvious.

__

My Fucking Gawd!

She had a red bandanna like pirate hat, it had a blue cross and bone on the front, her hair hanging in wavy curls around it. Her gorgeous belly button and abdomen bare for me. She looked good enough to eat, and I could feel myself getting hard just from looking at her.

"Have a seat Eddie." She purred with a wink. I nodded numbly and sat on the edge of my bed. She pressed a button on her ipod and the music began. "Enjoy Eddie." She purred again._My Girlfriend's a dick magnet My Girlfriend's got a have it  
She's hot, can't stop, up on stage, doing shots, Tip the man he'll  
Ring the bell, get her drunk she'll scream like hell.  
Dirty girl, getting' down, dance with guys from outta town.  
Grab her ass, actin' tough. Mess with her, she'll fuck you up.  
No one really knows if she's drunk or if she's stoned, but she's  
Comin' back to my place tonight!_

_She likes to shake her ass she grinds it to the beat  
She likes to pull my hair when I make her grind her teeth  
I like to strip her down she's mine until the end  
You know what she is, no doubt about it  
She's a bad, bad girlfriend!_

She's swinging her hips to the beat of the song and I can't hold in the groan, as she slides my leg between her hips. She unities' the sash pulling it back and forth across her back, tossing it to the side. She leans forward and brushes her chest against mine, as she pulls her self back to her feet. She pulls her arms around her back, Untying the top she slowly brings the side forward. As she pulls it down the fabric rubs her pert nipples, which harden at the contact. I raise my hands needing to feel her full breast, but she smacks my hands away.

"No touching Eddie. What would your girlfriend think." She says innocently, nibbling on her lower thong, Party's on, Love this song, sing along.

_Come together, leave alone, see you later back at home  
No one really knows if she's drunk or is she's stoned  
But she's coming back to my place tonight. I say  
No one really knows just how far she's gonna go,  
But I'm gonna find out later tonight._

_She likes to shake her ass she grinds it to the beat  
She likes to pull my hair when I make her grind her teeth  
I like to strip her down she's mine until the end  
You know what she is, no doubt about it  
She's a bad, bad girlfriend!_

She turns her back to me and lowers herself over my crotch, where my cock is becoming painful it's straining so hard. She sways her hips across my lap, bringing her hands down and shimming out of her skirt. Her bare ass is now pressed into me. Her little back thing looking very deliciously inviting. She turns and is now facing me with her beautiful breast in my face, and I can't help it, I take a nip at the right one. She moans throwing her head back.

"Eddie your not supposed to touch." She 't take her long to make things right.

_But does it make her wrong to  
Have the time of her life. the time of her life_

_(My girlfriend's a dick magnet My girlfriend's gotta have it)_

_She's a gold digger now you figure out it's over, pull the trigger.  
Futures finished, there it went, savings gone,  
The money spent_

_I look around and all I see is, no good, bad and ugly,  
Man she's hot and fixed to be, the future  
Ex-Miss Connolly!_

_She likes to shake her ass she grinds it to the beat  
She likes to pull my hair when I make her grind her teeth  
I like to strip her down she's mine until the end  
You know what she is, no doubt about it  
She's a bad, bad girlfriend!_

_She's a bad, bad girlfriend.  
She's a bad, bad girlfriend._

The song ends and she's left in nothing but her pirate boots and a black thong. She is also sitting on my lap still so I do the only thing my brain can think at the moment. I flip her over and rip the thong off her body. She gasps as I pull up and undo my pants quickly. The urge to take her is so strong I don't bother doing anything other than pulling down my boxers and jeans.

"Edward.." She gasps.

"Shhh.. Were doing this my way." I tell her huskily.

She's laid out in front of me squirming. she knows what is about to happen. I crawl on top of her and kiss her beautiful full lips. I slip my tongue in her mouth as she sucks on it a bit before her's begins to mingle with mine. They swirl together as my hands start to massage her breast. I bring one hand down to my length and situate to her opening. I plunge in to her and she gasp, pulling away from my mouth.

I start to thrust, and she's clawing up my back. She brings her legs up and I feel the heel of her boots dig into my ass as I pound into her sweet flesh harder. We continue for a few minutes before she starts to clench, and I close my eyes as I hold myself back.

"Oh fuck Edward." She screams out.

I thrust harder as I feel her orgasm take over. It's all I can do not to come as she milks me. I pull her face back to mine as I angle my self to hit her special spot. She moans into my mouth. I wont my own release, so I bring my hand down between us. I begin to rub circles on her clit, while I pull her nipple into my mouth.

"One more." I groan out.

I feel her start to tighten and I watch as she comes, knowing mine is following right behind her. I bite down on her shoulder as she screams out my name.

"Holy shit." I moan as I spill inside her. I slow my movements and collapse on top of her. After a couple minutes to recoup as I stare at her as she's looking back at me. I narrow my eyes at her and she giggles.

"What the fuck was that?" I asked bewildered.

"I thought you'd like it." She smiled.

"I fucking loved it, but I was freaking out there for a minute." I sigh pulling her close to me.

"You didn't really think I'd let you get a stripper.?" She asked looking up at me with those beautiful brown eyes.

"I didn't want one. I did however enjoy the one I got."

"I'm glad." She sighed. "I love you Edward, Happy early Birthday." She kisses my lips and I sigh because I'm happy she's here. This is all I wanted for my birthday anyway. Just Her.

"I love you too my beautiful Bella." I rub her back slowly. "Do you think I can get a repeat performance on Monday?" I ask.

"Sure" She giggles.

"Hey Bella, I was thinking. I wont you to move in with me." I blurt out, I look down at her to see her eyes widened and mouth agape_. Oh shit!_

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_**Author's Note: **So yeah I wanted to do smoething with a birthday since mine is Monday. I be twenty fucking three bitches. I am excited as hell, because I get to party this weekend. It is going to be fuck aWESOME. i CAN'T WAIT. _

_So push the magic button and let me know what you think. I take any and all reviews._

_For those of you reading my other stroies, I am goanna try to get something out today. I promise. If I don't I will work all day Monday and Tuesday untill I have a update for all my stories. I would do it this weekend, but I get a baby sitter once every blue moon, as imma use to my vantage. Love to my bbs. Later xCrystal_


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